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Fixing Her Eyes in 2020

What have you found hard?

Lockdown was hard because as a primary school teacher, I really missed seeing my colleagues and students face to face. My buddy-teacher and I made lots of personalised ‘Happy birthday’ videos for each student the day before we went into lockdown so they could see us both in our classroom on their birthday and could know we were thinking of them.

As teachers we had a lot of new IT skills to learn in 2 days! Making videos, Microsoft team meetings with students and parents, marking submitted work on notebook and lots and lots of emails to answer! Meeting with my colleagues every second day was such a highlight! It was so nice to ‘see’ them, even if it was only virtually.

I missed having birthday and wedding celebrations for colleagues. I missed being able to farewell colleagues who were leaving school, and staff who left church.

I still miss singing with my students and singing with people at church.

I missed catching up with friends for a coffee or a movie.

I missed hugging people!!!!

I missed going to the beach for Easter holidays during lockdown and a Hamilton Island holiday pre-booked for July was cancelled due to border closures. The ocean recharges me, so it was disappointing that we couldn’t go.

What has surprised you?

I was surprised that I could learn how to do lots of IT stuff fairly quickly! (Although, I must admit, my 16 year old son became my IT go-to guy! Thankfully he was happy to oblige-with a wry smile.)

I really liked cooking sweet treats for my family on weekends, since we couldn’t go out to eat. I made my first ever sponge cake but I only had one round cake pan and one ring pan, so the top layer had a hole in the centre of it! Ha ha! I wish I was Nigella Lawson in the kitchen, but I am definitely not!

My lovely Salvation Army neighbour led our cul-de-sac in a driveway dawn service on Anzac Day. Many of us stood in our driveways (some in dressing gowns) at 6am listening to the Last post, saying the Ode and singing Abide With Me. It was such a deeply moving experience. I won’t forget this special moment with my neighbours.

On Easter morning our lovely, thoughtful neighbours left a bag of Easter Eggs and several toilet rolls on our front door-step. Such a lovely surprise!

What have you learned about yourself?

I’m a hugger!

“Don’t it always seem to go, you don’t know what you got til it’s gone....” (Big Yellow Taxi-Joni Mitchell)

I’m not as introverted as I thought. I really missed being with people.

What have you learned about God?

On nights I couldn’t sleep due to stress I would listen to the Soultime app. A beautiful Irish lady’s voice would read a series of Bible verses to me and pray for me after a guided Christian meditation. This was so soothing and calming.

It was lovely to ‘visit’ other churches online and see old friends leading worship from their homes.

Sharing communion with my husband and sons on Good Friday while watching online church was such a special moment.

God is our ever present help in times of need and He will meet us where we are. Psalm 88 is a lament which offers no hope or resolution but is an important psalm because calling out to God in our suffering is an act of faith and trust even when there are no answers within reach. 

What is something that has brought you joy this season?

Wearing tracky-dacks and slippers every day was lovely. Brekky in bed til 8am was a daily, decadent treat.

I really like having a colourful garden (I planted a new hedge, over a 100 bulbs and lots of flowers!)

My husband (on guitar) and son (on drums) helped me to record a worship song to share with my students, which was so much fun to share.

I have been invited to join a Christian women’s song-writers group and I’m loving hearing the songs God has put on their hearts.

I thought I wrote a lament: ‘How Long’ song while driving in the car, but then realised it is way too like the U2 ‘40 (How Long)’ song, so I can’t say it’s my own work... I’ll try a rewrite soon....

Photo: My holey-lockdown sponge!


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